Image via WikipediaRoman used to say I worried too much.
Coming from someone as aloof as Roman, I easily rebuked his critique with my preferred take of simply being "conscientious" instead. After all I argued, who was he to accuse me of feeling things too much?? Of course he thought I worried too much...especially considering how he worried about nothing at all.
Roman was smart. He got the message loud and clear. Never being one to fight a losing battle, he learned quickly not to argue coping skills or semantics with this educational psychologist in training. So when he could see that I was not receptive to his words, he changed tactics, using my beloved psychology against me.
Switching from a tone of implied criticism to one dripping with sweet, sappy compassion; Roman looked into my eyes as he raised his index finger to his pursed lips - warmly uttering, "ssshhhh..." as if to soothe me from my worrying self.
Awww, sweet!
Well, not so fast..
Roman's kindhearted "Ssshhh.." stretched onward however, into a mischievous and far less sentimental, "Ssssssssshhhhhhut-up...........................sssssssshhhhhhhhut-it. Shut up." And of course, followed with a wisely placed - bold, cheeky grin. The result always being one of shocked laughter on my part, which snapped me out of my funk and successfully got me to stop whining every time.
Roman was a brave, brave man. Funny too...but more than that, he was brave.
But he was right. Back then, I did concern myself with too much minutia. Never mind the impact that his cheating and sudden death has had on my tendency to fret. Fears resulting from that are entirely different. The very fact that I started this blog is reassurance to me that I will not allow myself to be held back by fear, even though in truth, it freaks my freak. Which brings me to the point of this post..
Lately, Sunny Sings The Blues has received some humbling attention and praises. Activities that, while positive, could easily turn this worry wart into a bumbling mess. It's silly, really. Still, it's my cross to bear in this life of mine. No matter though, I now know when to sssssshhhhhhhhut it and get out of my own way.
Today, I am being featured in two lovely spots. And instead of freaking out and withdrawing to my safe place, I decided to mention it to readers. You can find a feature today on www.grownuprachel.com and you can also tune in to hear me *gasp* speaking about my blog on http://www.blogtalkradio.com/extremewritingnow today at 6:30 pm, Eastern time.
Now if you don't mind...I think I need to go throw up..
This song came on my iPod as I was writing this post...How very apropos!
